Caption Contest #25 Winners!

Hey everybody! We have winners for Caption Contest #25! Yes that's winners—plural, with an s. Our judges were stymied at the prospect of choosing just one winner, so we divided the entries into two categories and we have two winners!

In the Dirty Minds category:
WINNER:

Nilpad said...
Optics for all your middle-aged guy needs!


FINALISTS:
Alyssa said...

Although the invite specifically said "bare-naked birding", Geoff didn't feel comfortable unless he brought along certain..."enhancements."

Erik said...
Looks like Geoff stores his Viagra in his optics case.

In the Funny and Clean category:
WINNER:
Leslie said...
OK, scan north until you hit Michigan, look for third jack pine from the left, halfway up the tree, eight o'clock, sitting on skinny branch against the sky, yellow breast, black streaking, split white eye ring..........

FINALIST:
kevbosnafu said...
Our new 'Pinocchio' binoculars will let your birding friends know when you are....exaggerating... about that ivory-billed in the backyard.

Congratulations to our two winners and all of our finalists! And thanks to all who played!

Leslie and Nilpad, please contact me via e-mail to give me your details and claim your prizes! bt3 AT birdwatchersdigest DOT com. Use the subject line BOTB Caption Contest.

Thank you!

Caption Contest #25!

It's been a while since we had a good old-fashioned caption contest here at Bill of the Birds. In fact it's been WAY TOO LONG! So here goes...

My good buddy and New River Birding & Nature Festival co-founder Geoff Heeter is using some impressive binoculars in this image.

Almost as impressive is your opportunity to submit a clever caption for this photograph and garner a fabulous prize if your caption is chose as the winning entry. The prize is a personally autographed copy of The New Birder’s Guide written by yours truly.

Here are the rules:

1.     Use the Comments section of this blog (below) to create and enter your caption.

2.     Make sure there’s a way for our panel of esteemed judges to identify and contact you by including your Blogger name, non-linkable e-mail address, Google+ or Twitter handle, etc.

3.     Get your entry (or entries, there’s no limit other than your time and imagination) in by May 22, 2014.

4.     Entries must be in English or in one of the other identifiable languages of Planet Earth (no Klingon or High Valyrian entries please).

5.     Encourage your friends, birding pals, social media contacts, and frenemies to enter.

6.     Sit back, enjoy the entries from others less clever than you

7.     Wait for the announcement of your BOTB Caption Contest victory!

Thanks for playing and let’s be careful out there.

—BOTB

Caption Contest #24

I'm pretty sure we've found a new product that's guaranteed to get rid of pesky artist/naturalists, but we need a caption from you that sells this new product to the unsuspecting public.

If you've got a great idea for a caption for this new product ad, share it here using the Comments window of my blog. I'll pick a winner on Friday, December 14, 2012. Thanks to Julie Zickefoose for being in the photo. I'm not sure if her face is revealing worry or relief.

Gentlepeople: start your caption engines!

Caption Contest #23 Winner!

Kirby the Kestrel's Appalachian Hair cuttin' corral!

That's the winning entry in Caption Contest #23, submitted, along with several other clever ones, by Robert Mortensen. Congrats to Robert for another big win. He gets a year's-worth of Bird Watcher's Digest for this prize-winning caption.

This was another hard caption contest to judge.
Some other really funny entries:

Carla said... I just know this would make great nesting material if it wasn't stuck to this human!

tommyart said...Thank goodness for the Buzz Cut... It makes it easier to find the bugs!

Alan Pulley said...Training to be a pirate is hard work!

Robert Mortensen said...Following the trail of reflecting ultraviolet light from the mammal's urine, the Kestrel finally tracks down and grasps the juvenile Homo sapien biped.

Robert Mortensen said..."What he really wanted to take with him for his first year at Hogwart's School of Witchcraft and Wizardry was a Snowy Owl, like Harry Potter's Hedwig. But alas, his family was so poor, nary a shirt for the lad could they afford. He had to settle for Kirby, the family farm's Sparrow Hawk."

Chris Harbard said...Marge decided to try a novel approach to rid Brett of his head-lice.

Anonymous said...Mom, he followed me home. Can I keep him?

Thanks to all who participated! And special thanks to Rondeau Ric McArthur for the image. You can read ALL the submitted captions along with the original post here.

Caption Contest #23

Yes friends, it's time once more for a Bill of the Birds Caption Contest. Send in your clever caption (using the comments interface on this blog) by Tuesday, September 4, 2012. If your caption is selected as the overall winner, you'll receive a year's subscription to Bird Watcher's Digest.

This amazing photo was contributed by my good pal Rondeau Ric McArthur who is a past winner of the caption contest here at Bill of the Birds.

Caption Contest #22 Winner!

Caution: objects seen in your camera are bigger than they appear.

The winning caption was submitted by our clever Canadian friend Rondeau Ric.

Though I have to admit that the judging committee liked several others, including:

Mark S. Garland: Even if the goalkeeper is down, I am not going to play a header.

Wendy Eller: After Jack and his friends climbed the beanstalk, they decided to attend a soccer game.

Richard: Let's see Chet Baker pop this one !!

John W.: A dragonfly with an all-yellow head ...and very close-set eyes. Nope, not in this field guide.

Erik: Anyone else's cell phone getting 5,000,000,000,000 bars?

and...

Murr Brewster: Sorry. I'm not touching this caption with a ten-inch pole.

Caption Contest #22!

Most of you know the drill by now for these BOTB Caption Contests. I mean, we've done 21 of them! For any fresh-faced newcomers, here's how it goes:

Use the Comment interface at the bottom of this post to write a silly/funny/engaging/philosophical caption for the photograph shown above, then wait around twiddling your thumbs while our panel of world-renowned caption experts debates the merits of all submissions (and guzzles huge amounts of micro-brewed pale ale, or if it's breakfast time, bird-friendly shade-grown coffee and a few pale ales). They pick a winner. If it's you, you get a fabbo prize: in this case one of the brand-new products from Bird Watcher's Digest: a optics cleaning kit.

So huff some fog on your spec lenses and clean off the schmutz so you can see to write your most bestest, funniest caption. I can't wait to read it!

Caption Contest #21 WINNER!

The Rain Crows rehearse for their upcoming gig at the nudist camp,
singing with a bear behind.

Congrats to Amy Girten for the winning entry!

Choosing a winner for these caption contests is always tough—there are so many clever entries! This time was even tougher.

First runner-up:
Alan Pulley said...That's Bill Thompson singing background, for those that may not recognize him without his shirt.

And honorable mentions to:
Beyond My Garden said...Listen to the Rain Crows. It's worth coming out of hibernation.

Erik said...His name must be Pooh, he's trying to pick up the honeys.

Erik also said...Which one looks slower? Which one looks slower?

cyberthrush said...Dang, ripped off again... thought I paid to see The Barenaked Ladies perform and only realized after arriving that the ticket said "The Bearnaked Ladies."

Northern Goshawker said...With the Grateful Dead no longer touring, the dancing bears have been looking for a good summer jam band and found one in the Rain Crows. Here, Cubby is chillin’ to Cotton Candy Sky.

I could easily pick a winner at random—you all are some funny folks!

I hope you enjoy these little side-trips to goofyland. I know I do! Thanks for playing everyone!

Caption Contest #21

Yes, kids, it's time once again for another Bill of the Birds Caption Contest. Use the comment interface of this blog to submit your clever caption for the photo above and, if your entry is selected as the winner, you will receive a fabulous prize: a collector's edition copy of the ultra-rare, best-selling bird book Bird Watching For Dummies autographed by the author (if we can find him and get him sobered up enough to make his mark).

Back story: This photo shows Julie Zickefoose (left) and Wendy Eller (in blue jacket) performing a Rain Crows' song during my recent milestone birthday celebration. Backing the gals were members of The Realbillies (not shown) from Athens, Ohio. There was a stuffed black bear in the corner of the stage area and a friend took this photograph with my camera. I think the image opens up a world of caption possibilities and I cannot wait to see what y'all come up with!

Deadline is Tuesday March 20, 2012. Now start bruin up some funny captions!

Caption Contest #20 Winner!

The body was dumped in an area which was guaranteed to get no foot traffic. At press time, police have yet to locate the left arm.

Wow! Jason over at OpposableChums really hit a homer with his caption. Or as perennial caption maven Erik Bruder put it: "OC brough a cannon to a pillow fight!"

Jason is the proud winner of a set of birding bumper stickers from the BWD Nature Shop.

Other entries that got numerous votes from our panel of judges (though we always like ALL of the entries):

Harley Winfrey said...
Sure he's a birding celebrity, but when you meet BT3 in person, he's just so down to earth.

Julie Zickefoose said...
Thousands attended Bill's book signing. Thousands of chiggers.

steve moore said...
Bill learns that when stretching the elastic Bino Harness to maximum length...you should never just let go.

Peggy said...
Virgin planker gets it all wrong!

John Workman said...
Noted Author and Authority on Birding Demonstrates "The Thompson Method" for Attracting Turkey Vultures.

Thanks to everyone who played. We'll post another caption contest as soon as we find the next truly goofy photo.

Caption Contest #20

My dear BOTB readers: It is time for the first Caption Contest of 2012. Please send in your clevermost caption for the image above. Use the Comments interface below to craft and deliver your bon mot.

Deadline is Friday morning, January 13, 2012 at 10:14 am. I (and my panel of very nearly ethical judges) will select a winner on that day. The winning entry gets a set of birding bumper stickers and a NEW CAR* to put them on!

Good luck and may the farce be with you.

*by "new car" we mean a Matchbox car stolen from my son Liam's overflowing toy chest in the basement. I promise to choose one that still has all four wheels fully functioning.

Caption Contest #19 Winner!

"Birding the Grassland" is brought to you in part by Sure deodorant and antiperspirant - wetness protection for men and women. When you are celebrating that life bird, never let the other birders see you sweat.

Our winner is Robert over at Birding is Fun! Congrats Robert!

It was really hard for our judges to pick just one winner. So we went with the one that gave us the biggest initial laugh.

Other strong entries:

Kate said...Oh Baird's Sparrow Gods, we beseech you. May you provide us with many close looks and breeding displays!

Kelly Hendrix said...Bill and friends trying to lure in a rare bird by doing a fancy mating display to the song "YMCA".

Erik (perennial contender) said...The "airing of the pits" made the next 7 hours in the van more bearable.

CrystalsCozyKitchen said...How the bird got the gun to hold up the birdwatchers, we may never know.

Thanks to all who played! Robert, you can pick up your winner's loot at The Midwest Birding Symposium in one month!

Until next time!

Caption Contest #19

Pull out the lobe of your brain in which clever quips are created, shake it awake, and send us your most funniest caption for the photo above. In case it matters to you and your creative process, the above image was taken in June near Chase Lake NWR in North Dakota. That's all I'm permitted to share due to several restraining orders.

If your funnyhaha caption is chosen as the winner, you will receive a set of the forthcoming Birder's bumper stickers from the BWD Nature Shop. That's a $15 value, people.

Please use the comments window below to enter. A winner will be chosen on Tuesday, August 9, so get your entry in by midnight on August 8, 2011. Good luck!

Caption Contest #18 Winner!

It's time to announce the winner of the Bill of the Birds Caption Contest #18. You can see the original post for Contest #18 here.

Congratulations to Robert Mortensen from the Birding is Fun blog for his winning caption which is:

On the eve of their nuptials, Prince William and Kate Middleton kissed and they both turned into toads. A very public couple, regrettably with no modicum of privacy, British paparazzi photographed them consummating the marriage.

He also chimed in with this one:

The minister said not to do this before marriage or we'd get warts. I guess he was right!

Robert wins a $20 gift certificate from the BWD Nature Store.

Some other great chuckles were generated by these contributors:

Face said...

Ribbit to me one more time, once is never enough for a frog like you...

tommyart said...

I knew we should of done this back at my pad.

CNemes said...

Not tonight, dear, I've got a frog in my throat.

pambirds said...

“It’s okay Trudy, no one will see us – they’re all looking up for the warblers.”

Thanks to everyone for playing!

Caption Contest #18

I toad you we weren't done with the Bill of the Birds Caption Contests! Here's the latest. Send in your clever caption for this photograph (keeping your cleverness on the clean side of the NC-17 line). Our panel of ninja-like judges will select a winner and that winner will receive a coupon code good for $20 in the BWD Online Nature Shop. Deadline for your caption that trumps all captions is Thursday, April 28.

Good luck! Gentlepeople start your captions!

Winner of Caption Contest #17

Let's make one thing perfectly clear: My pal Dr. Steve Banner (pictured above) was NOT nekkid in this photo, though it certainly looks like he is. He is a good sport for sending in this photo along with a note suggesting it as a caption contest image! I'm proud to have Steve, an accomplished birder/tour leader/photographer/nudist wear a BWD bino-harness , regardless of whatever else he is (or is not) wearing.

We got a laundry-basket-full of great captions for contest #17. You can read all of them via the captions link on the original post.

Our extensive and distinguished panel of judges has chosen a winner and it's: Christoph Lange who wrote this caption:

Please read the manual of your GPS device carefully before using it for navigation!

Congrats to Christopher! Please send me your address via e-mail (editor AT birdwatchersdigest.com) so we can send you your fabulous prize.

Several other captions tickled the ribs of our judges, including:

Birding is Fun! said..."Does this bino harness give me man-boobs?"

Zeke Watkins said...(cue Davis Attenborough Voice) "This is the rare elusive Naked Birder. This male individual is seen here bathing and using a tool to search for the even rarer Female Naked Birder. The female has never been documented in the wild. Note the male's solitary lifestyle."

Connie Kogler said...No Butts, No Lory.

cyberthrush said...The new Swarovski binoculars were absolutely superb, though the free thong strap they threw in pinched a bit...

Jeff Bouton said...Thank god for waterproof optics... hope those are Leicas!

Phoebe (: said...What happens when you keep birders out all day without a bathroom.

Rondeau Ric said...Ed Robinson, lead singer for the Canadian band, Bare Naked Ladies, takes up birdwatching.

Thanks to all for playing (or just lurking)! Judging from the traffic that contest #17 received, I need to post more semi-nekkid images here on Bill of the Birds.

Caption Contest #17

Taking a temporary break from my series of Papua New Guinea posts, I thought we'd snuggly into another Bill of the Birds caption contest.

Please submit your clever caption for this photo (of my friend Dr. Steve Banner using his BWD bino harness in a Scandinavian hot spring) and if your entry is selected as the winner by our panel of judges, you'll receive an autographed copy of the currently out-of-print (and oh-so collectible) best-selling book "Bird Watching For Dummies."

Get it? Got it? Good!

Caption Contest #16 Winner!

"It's been four hours...somebody call a doctor!"

Our winner of Caption Contest #16 is Alan Pulley, who blogs here at Birds 'N Such. Congrats Alan! Your lens cloth will be shipped out shortly!


Other notable entries include: Chris Harbard who said...
The lure for the Worm-eating Warbler should attract them from miles away!

Though he swore it wasn't a caption, I loved this one from cyberthrush:
I hope I die one day just like my dear old grandaddy, quickly and peacefully in my sleep... and not screaming hysterically like the 25 passengers of the bus he was driving at the time.

Jason, from OpposableChums said...All entreaties in hopes of convincing Lorenzo to leave his baguette at home for the trip to sit amongst the Silver-back gorillas were sadly fruitless, and with regrettably gruesome consequences.

Janet Creamer said..."Well, I was told Bill will show us more warblers than you can shake a stick at."

bpadgett said... I *said*, "Speak SOFTLY!!"

Thanks to everyone for your enthusiastic participation. I wish I had participation ribbons for all of you because you're ALL winners in my book (which just came out, by the way!). [smooth, huh?]

For the record, the be-hatted guy with the walking stick in the front of the shot is Scott, a regular at the New River Birding Festival. He hand-makes those walking sticks and they are really functional works of art.

Caption Contest #16

When I lead field trips at birding festivals, I often snap photos of the group on the bus. I'm not sure why—it just happens, I guess. This photo comes from last spring's New River Birding and Nature Festival in Fayetteville, WV. I believe it was on the High Country tour, where we go forth seeking warblers.

It struck me as a good one for a BOTB caption contest. So let your freak flag fly and send your most cleverest caption in by midnight, Sunday, September 12, 2010 using the comment window below. The winner will receive a genuine BWD lens cloth (a $5 value!) which works great for cleaning optics, eyeglasses, cellphones, or the Cheeto-stained screen on your iPad.

Good luck and we'll see you on the bus.

Caption Contest #15 Winner!

And the winner is...
Jessica with her cavalcade of captions:

Certhia americana [editor's note: this is the Latin name for brown creeper]

Wow. I could be birding, but instead I’m looking at some dude’s butt.

Monitoring the nest wasn’t the same after the restraining order…

Using a combination of drab plumage, shiny objects and ground display, Bill attempts to lure female birders.

After successfully avoiding warbler neck, another unsuspecting birder falls victim to grouse gut.

AMERICAN PSYCHIATRIC ASSOCIATION'S DIAGNOSTIC AND STATISTICAL MANUAL Figure 2.2: An inverse relationship exists between the rarity of a bird and the decorum of the watcher.


And these were big hits with the judging crew:
Erik (always in the running it seems) said...:
After reviewing his photos, Bill realized wicking fabrics were not the best choice for the Bird Boxers.

cyberthrush said...
In their first-ever trial-run the brand new Depends-For-Birders failed to live up to their advanced 'billing.'

Julie Zickefoose said....
As the Palawan Peacock-pheasant rewarded a six-hour stakeout by finally striding into view, Bill overwhelmed his astronaut's diaper.

spencer said...

"Birder falls on face just short of finish line" ;)

Idaho Birder said...

Yes, as a matter of fact, I did sit on my McGriddle breakfast sandwiches.

Janet Creamer said...

Pants on the ground, pants on the ground, lookin' like a fool with your pants on the ground...

Congrats to Jessica! She wins a signed and numbered BWD cover print of her choice. [Jessica, if you're out there, send me a message with your print choice and contact info to editor-AT-birdwatchersdigest.com.] You can view a gallery of our limited edition prints here.

Thanks to all of you for your participation. This contest's captions seemed especially clever!