It seems like only yesterday I was a freckle-faced little ankle-biter roaming the gently rolling, sparsely wooded land around Pella, Iowa. Yes, I was born just 45 years ago today in that charming little Iowa town where they say "You're not much if you're not Dutch!"
And now, just a couple of blinks later, I'm opening my mail and getting solicitations from the freaking AARP! As much as I'd LOVE to retire tomorrow, I'm not prepared to do any of the following:
- trade in my Keens for arch supports
- place my teeth in a glass at night
- trading my boxers for adult diapers (not even the cool astronaut kind you can wear for an entire week)
- Jello shots of Geritol
If you ask me they are robbing the cradle. 45 is NOT 65!
Life is short, friends. Slurp it up!